Is It Normal to Lose Feelings in a Relationship?

Relationships can be difficult at times, and it’s not uncommon for us to find ourselves losing romantic feelings and facing the decision of whether to stay with a partner or break up.

If you’re in this position right now and aren’t sure if you want to continue the relationship, it’s important to remember that relationships can go through many different stages and change over time.

How do I know if I’m losing interest in my relationship?

Below are red flags that may indicate your relationship may need to be reevaluated.

• You stop talking. If you used to share details of your day with your partner and ask their opinion on things but have stopped, this could be a sign of a lost connection.
• Your attitude has changed. If you feel like you’re treating others the same way, but your partner is acting differently than usual, it could be a sign that your attitude toward them has changed.
• You make yourself less available. You feel like you’re withdrawing from your partner, or that you’re not physically responsible for them.
• You neglect your partner. If you used to ask about their schedule or check in during the workday but it seems like you’ve lost interest, it could be a sign that things have changed.
• Now you don’t argue. Maybe you feel like it’s not worth your time to discuss. Or, you may feel as if you are not affected by the problems that arise.

While these are just a few red flags to watch out for, they don’t mean your relationship is over. If you’re willing to work to rekindle that spark, there are a few things you can do.

Why have I lost feelings for my partner?

Many factors can cause one to lose passion in a relationship. These include:

• Poor communication can ruin relationships with people
• The initial feelings of lust fade over time, which can make the feelings of love seem less intense
• We change over time, which can mean that people can grow apart
• Changing priorities can mean that each person has different, sometimes conflicting, goals

However, every relationship is different. In reality, many different factors can play a role. Over time, poor communication and lack of intimacy can contribute to more conflicts and problems that worsen this loss of romantic feelings for your partner.

How do you restore passion in a relationship?

If you are interested in trying to restore your relationship, there are ways to do so. The most important factor is that you and your partner want the same thing, whether it’s relationship therapy or a divorce.

If neither of you is interested in saving the marriage, it won’t work unless you have a very strong reason to be together.

Take a step back to move forward

Take some time to think about what the first phase of your relationship was like before you started losing feelings. Ask yourself what was different. Did you treat each other the way you did?

Try to relive those moments, whether it’s by going out on a date, ordering the same food you had, or doing some of the old things you both used to do together for fun. These things may seem trivial, but they can be essential in triggering your mind to remember how you feel about someone and why you felt the way you once did.

Remember the things you like about your partner

Take some time to think about the qualities you like about your partner. Pay attention to the things they do that bring a smile, like their sense of humor or how spontaneous they are.

If these traits are valued most, plan for more fun by exploring new activities in an exciting way. If it is not these qualities but the friendliness and loving gestures that make them great partners, then try to connect with them every day instead of prioritizing other matters.

Keep you and your partner interested and supportive

In the early stages of a relationship, sometimes known as the honeymoon stage, the two of you are still seeing each other separately, so you hold on to the aspects of who you are that make you feel complete. Often, these are the very qualities that made you fall in love with your partner. Don’t forget what it feels like to be your person for them.

Create a culture of appreciation and respect

We all have our flaws. Instead of focusing on your partner’s shortcomings, learn to accept them. And whenever you can express the things you love about your partner.

According to relationship expert Kyle Benson, “The idea is to catch your partner doing something right and say, ‘Thanks for doing that. I noticed you unloaded the dishwasher, and I appreciate that.’

Strengthen your emotional intelligence

Erin Leonard, Ph.D., says, “It’s easy to get close but staying close requires that two people possess certain emotional skills. A discrepancy in emotional intelligence can cause a split.”

A healthy relationship requires both partners to work hard and empathize with each other to succeed. If one partner is not willing, this can cause an issue that needs to be addressed quickly before the relationship deteriorates.

Talk to them

Although it may seem obvious, many couples forget how to sit down and talk to each other. You don’t have to come up and tell them how you feel right now, but small talk can help you open the door to more meaningful conversations later.

When this happens, be upfront and tell your partner how you feel. Together, you’ll be able to make the decision to move forward. Communicating with honesty and trust is all you need to rekindle a relationship.

Date your partner again

It’s easy to stop paying as much attention to your partner as you did in the beginning, but if you want to rekindle the feelings you once shared, it can be as simple as paying more attention to the relationship.

If you’re married, remember that it doesn’t mean you have to stop seeing each other. Treat them like you were trying to win them over. Think about what you used to do for each other and recreate those experiences, like when you went on your first date, things you used to do together, etc.

Is it okay to lose feelings in a relationship?

You may find yourself wondering if you could lose feelings for someone you love. You may wonder if you really love them in the first place.

It’s perfectly normal to feel more or less in love with your partner. At the same time, it’s painful to stay silent in a relationship that makes you feel lost or doubt its future.

If you lose your feelings, does the question become whether you should stay in the relationship? If you’re struggling in your relationship, at some point, you’ll need to decide if you want to keep working or if you want something else.

Only you can decide which path is right for you. If you decide to end the relationship, start by considering the pros and cons of living together.

Couples counseling

As long as you are both willing to fight for your relationship, couples therapy can help you with your changes and progress. An experienced therapist can help you identify areas that need improvement and help you learn different strategies to improve your relationship, such as active listening or communication skills.

Being transparent and honest will always be the most important step in strengthening the feelings and quality of your relationship. If you’re not ready to do the work, consider seeing a counselor yourself. They can help you decide and work out how to move forward.

Keep in mind

At some point, if you still don’t have romantic feelings, it’s important to accept that fact and start moving on. Your partner deserves a relationship partner with whom they can share love. No one will do less than that because they deserve a life full of happiness and love.