How to Be a Better Friend, According to Therapists

When we think about improving our lives, we often focus on things like career success, financial goals, or personal health. But strengthen your friendship? This is a real power move.

But being a good friend does not always come naturally, especially in a world that spreads us, engaging, engaged and often very thin. Good news? Friendship is a skill that you can work on and be like anything.

We asked mental health experts what it takes to be a really better friend – and how can you deepen friendship that is most important.

What makes a good friend?

Being a good friend does not always know about what he has to know about the perfect thing or throw the epic birthday parties. It is about presence, curiosity and consistency.

“To be a friend to be a friend,” says Dr. Andrew Kahn, a psychologist and associate director of the Associate Director of behavior.

Good friends listen without decisions, celebrate your win, sit with you in your losses, and make a safe place where you don’t need to perform or show off.

The founder of Menlo Park Psychiatry and Sleep Medicine, Dr. Alex Dimitreo – a psychologist and sleeping pharmaceutical specialist – Eggs. “A good friend is the one who shows in your happiness, listens well, shares, and supports you through challenges without a decision.”

In other words: You don’t have to be perfect. You have to be ready to show sympathy and curiosity.

Benefits of being a good friend

We often talk about the benefits of having good friends, but being a good friend can also promote your mental health.

When you show for others, you strengthen your sense of purpose and contact, two factors that are important in welfare. Strong friendship is associated with the lower levels of anxiety and sadness, better self -esteem, and even longer life expectancy.

Some research shows that a strong sense of society is associated with less feelings of sadness, anxiety and stress.

A 2022 study, which focused on friendship among adolescents, found that friendship is a “strong buffer” for childhood trauma. Strong friendship is linked to positive mental fitness, even among those who have faced difficulties in childhood.

On the other hand, social isolation is bad news for our health. Review of studies, which considered more than 1.30 million people, found that social isolation is linked to the increasing risk of death.

In 2023, the US Surgeon General published a consultation on the epidemic of isolation, which states that disconnecting socially affects the death of 15 cigarettes a day, and that isolation is related to poor health consequences, as well as cardiovascular diseases, dementia and dementia.

Loneliness is not only solved by keeping the good people around you, but also by standard contact with these people. This includes Existence A good friend as well as Be Good friends

All data points to the fact that humans need friendship in both mentally and physically.

5 practical points to be a better friend

Being a better friend is not about great gestures. It is about small, meaningful steps that promote confidence and links over time.

How’s it:

1. Listen more than you talk

It’s easy to get into the net waiting for your turn. But to hear the truth means to be present. The present will not plan your next comment while your friend is still talking.

As the priest said, sometimes the most helpful you can do the most helpful thing, “Listen, verify what your friend is feeling, and help them feel safe sharing.”

2. Confirm their experiences

You don’t have to fix your friend’s problems. Often, the best gift you can offer is verification – the simple but powerful process of acknowledging their emotions without minimizing, deciding, or offering an unusual advice.

3. Check regularly

You don’t need an hour -long conversation for your care. A quick “thinking about you – how are you doing?” The text can mean the world.

4. Celebrate their win (even small)

Sometimes helping a friend is much easier than a difficult time, more than more than his successes. But celebrating the achievements of your friends – whether big or small, is an important part of being a good friend.

5. respect their limits

Good friendship is made up of trust, and respecting the limits is a big part of it. Whether your friend needs space, not ready to talk, or instead of giving advice you need to listen, respecting their needs shows that you really care.

To indicate and avoid the behavior of poisonous friendship

Sometimes, what we think of as “help” can be actually harmful. Here’s what to see:

• Excessive decisive. Approves the decision, even properly, makes your friend feel unsafe.
• Making assumptions. Dr. Dmitrio has warned against “secret contracts” – fought expectations or limits. Rather, talk clearly and avoid assumptions.
• Making it about yourself. It is okay for your friend’s experiences, but keep in mind that you should not hijack your stories.
• Providing non -proclaimed advice. Unless your friend clearly demands your advice, focus on listening and verifying.

Likewise, for your own sake, you want to avoid friendship that makes you feel bad about yourself. “They say that you become an average of your friends’ group, so make sure you are in the group you appreciate, respect and trust them.”

If you begin to crawl any of these habits, do not defeat yourself-try consciously to correct it.

Helping friends with mental health challenges

Helping a friend who is struggling with his mental health can feel a lot. You want to be there for them, but you don’t even want to increase the therapist’s role.

Dr. Kahn says, “The most helpful friend listens, confirms what his friend is feeling, and helps them share about their mental health.” “Wherever possible, refrain from advising until they say to you.”

If you feel that your friend’s struggle appears to be deteriorating – as if they were withdrawing, losing work, or talking about being disappointed – it might be time to encourage them to get professional help.

Dr. Kahn says, “Telling your friend that you are worried about them and you see how much struggle they are struggling may be a helpful step.”

Use neutral, sympathetic language, and be prepared to support them, whether they are ready to seek help. Dr. Kahn says “Your friend may be ready to get help right now.” But telling them how you see how matters are going on shows you care. ”

To overcome personal challenges in friendship

Being a better friend doesn’t mean to be perfect – it means you are honest about your struggle.

Friendship flourishes when the two are ready to be weak and open. If you are struggling with social anxiety, low self -esteem, or other personal obstacles, working on these issues (either by self -help strategy or professional support) can make a real difference.

And remember: Sometimes it is okay to need a place. Deployed healthy boundaries. – and also respecting your friend’s limits – is a part of something that makes friendship strong and sustainable.

Dr. Dimitreo encourages people to set boundaries when needed in friendship. “Be clear about your needs and limits, and express them,” he says. “Don’t be indoor mats, and be aware of people who add you to one.”

Keep in mind

Friendship is not always about having the right words or doing perfect work. This presence is about to be shown in compassion, patience and small, everyday moments.

By listening deeply, confirming your friend’s emotions, being reliable, and working on your emotional health, you can be a friend that everyone deserves – and you will probably know that your own life feels more and more connected.

As the priest reminds us, “good friends are ready to listen, be present and be curious.” It is a beautiful solid place to start.